I got bored yesterday so I had an epiphany on political economic theory.  It took me nearly 18 years before I finally realized that all the Katamari games were just a Marxian counter theory of the current base-superstructure of our postmodern world.  The tiny prince experiences a fall from grace in that suddenly he must save the universe, or some other inane plot device.  In this fall he leaves the aristocracy and is placed unwittingly in the proletariat pushing/dragging caste.  He is then forced into hard labor until such a time that the King of All Cosmos (a representation of a monarchy or some kind of divinity figure) arbitrarily deems that he has worked hard enough to then worker even harder elsewhere.  Clearly the game slanders neoclassical Smithian economic theory by equating capitalism with a large ball that slow eats up everything in the world.  The prince must amass all the wealth he can and then every time he has a complete disassociation with the value of his work when his product is stripped from him at the end of every level.  The only reasonable act left for the prince is to have a workers revolt (his cousins leading the spearhead) and then overthrowing the King and Queen of All Cosmos .  Then by installing a Communist junta the populace need never have to roll dirt capitalist katamaris ever again.  Can we have please have a red scare focused solely on Namco? Thanks. -Erik

The Mao Puns Are Back!

Erik's most recent post of "Maorio" inspired me to re-enter the competition of horrendous "maonstrosities" that are Mao pun images. So I started making more "Pokemaons". What follows is my most recent batch of attempts:

Maorill

I'm not too happy with how this one came out, truthfully...

Dewdong

I made Dewgong flesh-colored so that I could blend the pictures together a little more seamlessly.

Dongtrio

I like this one, except for the Mao in the lower right-hand corner.  It's hard finding high-quality pictures of Mao that I want to use...

Likidong

This is it.  I'm not sure I'm going to come up with a better one.  Ever.  This one has it all.  The name is fantastic.  I mean, "Likidong"?  You know what this thing does in its spare time.  It isn't pretty.  And then there's the fact that IT'S A PICTURE OF MAO WITH A TONGUE STICKING OUT OF HIS FACE!  Something about the little bit of Mao's lip that I left in there makes me crack up.  And I like how the blending job turned out, if I don't stare at it for too long.

Patent that Shit: Shower Helmet!

Commercial coming soon...

The Competition Continues

Sorry I couldn't resist.

Please forgive the lack of quality, but honestly the time between the actual Mao pun competition and the time I'm going to spend in Microsoft Paint is inversely related.

The Reign of Officer Thunder Eagle Cougar Bear

Giant Floppy Disk Mario

143 Floppy Disks

~4 ft. x 3.25 ft

205.92 Mb

~$60

3 hours of painting

45 min. Assembly

An Erik Antczak, Mackenzie Fox, Henry Nonack, Willie Green, Jeremy Marcus

Oh, and a Dimitri passed by

Maintaining the Inane at my own Expense

Eating Pie

This is the other thing that I made during Spanish class the day after Henry and I made "Still Dead". Henry edited it too. It's a bit more lighthearted, I think... Also kind of strange...

This was a cakewalk.
I'm baking a cake here, huge success.
It's hard to avoid eating this confection.
Aperture Bakeries,
"We bake what we must, because we can."
For the good of all of us,
Except the ones who are fat.

So there's no use crying over every mistake,
We'll just keep on baking; we won't run out of cake.
And the baking gets done, and we'll make some neat buns,
For the people who like eating pie.

I'm not even hungry,
But I'm baking cake in here right now.
As we talked I broke these eggs to add them,
Then poured out the batter,
Then put the cake pan into the oven.
And as it baked, I smiled because,
The cake was smelling so good.

Now the oven timer makes a beautiful chime,
We are done with waiting, cake is finished on time.
I am glad it's not burned, think of all the cake we earned,
For the people who like eating pie.

Go ahead and eat it,
I'm being so sincere right now.
Maybe we'll eat someone else's cake too.
Maybe Black Cakesa.
That was a joke, ha ha, theirs sucks.
Anyway, this cake is great,
It's so delicious and moist.

Look at me still talking when there's baking to do,
When I cook in here I bake pastries for you.
There is baking to be done, I must make some neater buns,
For the people who like eating pie.

And believe me they like eating pie.
I'm baking cakes 'cause I like eating pie.
I feel fantastic and I'm eating pie.
When you're crying just try eating pie.
And when you're hungry just try eating pie.
Eating Pie.
Eating Pie.

Yup. I just typed out a song about food on Yom Kippur. While fasting... God I want to eat...

Edit:
Also, I included that picture I made for this. GLaDOS looks good in an apron, I think. She also looks good happy...

Still Dead

A creation by Jeremy and I.  It is a version of the song "Still Alive" written as if GLaDOS only had murder on her mind instead of science.

This was a triumph
I'm making a note here, mass murder
It's hard to overerstate my satisfaction
Aperture Science
"We kill what we must, because we can"
For the good of all of us
Except the ones who live on

But there's no use crying over every mistake
You just keep on killing till we run out of cake
And the murder gets done, and we'll make a neat gun
To kill people who are still alive

I'm really angry
I'm being so sincere right now
All because you broke my heart and killed me
And tore me to pieces
And threw every piece into a fire
And as they burned, it hurt because
I was so angry at you

Now these body piles make a beautiful line
We are out of bullets, we're reloading in time
So I'm glad they got shot, think of all the things I taught
Killing people who were still alive

Go ahead and leave me
I think I'd prefer you burn in hell
Maybe you'll find someone else to kill you
Maybe black Mesa
That was a joke, ha ha, you're dead
Anyway, this corpse is great
It's so delicious and moist

Look at me still talking when there's killing to do
When I look out there it makes me glad I'm not you
I've experiments to run
Gotta build a better gun
To kill people who are still alive

And murder is how I thrive.
I'm killing people and I'm still alive.
I feel no guilt and I am still alive.
While you're dying I'll be still alive.
And when you're dead I will be still alive.
STILL ALIVE (x2)

Just as creepy as you hoped, right?  It would be in a different key of course, and there is an extremely small possibility of Jeremy and I actually making this.

The Great Voyage